Mangirl

Black males in their 20s (and sadly 30s), who would reply in the affirmative if asked “Do you feel you live a Hip-Hop lifestyle?”, share many common interests with pre-teen white suburban girls. Don’t believe me?

1. They both get excited about anything with bubble lettering on it. Clothes, school supplies and shoes. Some of them will even write that way on walls or sidewalks, but only if they don’t think their parents will find out.

2. Speaking of shoes, they love to collect them. Like whole closets full. Even though they’ve only got two feet. If you’re obsessed with footie socks, chances are good you’re a black dude or a cheerleader.

3. On the subject of collecting, guess how they both feel about stickers.

4. You’ll often see them travel in packs at the mall. However, if their friends aren’t around they will often take every opportunity to tell you how much they can’t stand their “friends”.

5. They constantly post about their boring lives on Facebook. Guess what? We don’t care about your new mix tape, or what was said by Mrs. Shermer in algebra class.

Young black males: You dolts realize you have more in common with Hannah Montana than Tony Montana right? Honestly, I wouldn’t have such a problem with this new Roscoe Dash, Soulja Boyesque kind of young black male, but when did you guys decide to abandon your last alpha male bargaining chip?

I also don’t understand the very feminine matchy match need either. Your red fake eyeglasses matching your red Braves cap, matching your red skinny Levi jeans matching your patten leather red Nikes. Do you guys know the term contrast? It can be pleasant when two things aren’t exactly the same.

For instance, when men are not like girls.